It’s getting harder to tell if we’re living in reality or if the simulation is malfunctioning. Day-to-day life remains bizarre and each new piece of information is more unsettling than the last. In the same way you can only scream so loud, the onslaught of horrific news has become mundane. Traditional media is beyond stale. We’re free falling. Luckily, there doesn’t seem to be anything below our feet and until we hit something solid, we have the Internet to distract ourselves.

Let’s wrap the first half of 2021 into a tortilla-shaped time capsule.

MUSIC

🥉#3 Los Retros - Someone to Spend Time With

At a whopping 19-years-old, Los Retros is actually a one-man-show. Southern California’s Mauri Tapia has taken it upon himself to play every instrument in his recordings so everyone else is free to enjoy the tunes. Mellow sounds that hit like an old ‘70s album playing in the next room and perfect for a day at the pool.

🥈#2 Viagra Boyz - Ain’t Nice

A little bit like a Huey Lewis album you found in a gutter, The Viagra Boys have a unique sound that seems to translate especially well to live performances. It’s rock-hard hard rock that wavers between snoozy and jazzy. They may also be the most interesting thing to crawl out of Sweden since The Hives. Admittedly, I don’t love their entire catalogue, but there are plenty of gems that have kept me interested. They deserve their shrimp.

🏆#1 Australian Rock Bands

Something wicked is in the water throughout Southeastern Australia. The amount of genuinely entertaining punk/rock bands coming out of the area makes me want to bang my head and punch holes in the wall. The Chats, Skeggs, and (last year’s favorite) Amyl & The Sniffers have been tearing it up and making some of the best music since The Stooges were hooked on heroin. They’re also doing it without Hollywood studio connections. Raw, catchy, upbeat, and worth obsessing over.

COMEDY

🥉#3 Quiplash

Drumming and comedy collide in an experimental collaboration that probably doesn’t need to continue. It did make for a great five-minute video, though. Both Josh Harmon, the drummer, and Mark Normand, the comedian, are incredibly talented and I was shocked how well it worked with (seemingly) no rehearsal. The snappy jokes and one-liners definitely help match the zip of the jazz drumming. Talent!

🥈#2 I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson

With absurdist sketches in the same vein as Tim & Eric and The Kroll Show, SNL-alum Tim Robinson will swarm you with weirdness until you’re forced to laugh. As strange as each sketch may seem on the surface, there is depth that usually pulls from a hyper-focused common experience. Whether it be the weird guy at game night, group-think run amok, or a simple yet terrifying experience with a stranger, I’m sure you can relate to all the blood and drool.

🏆#1 Hot Gay Sets Ep. 1

Everything I love in one video. A raw, minimally-produced, but very well edited, slice of reality. Take a gaze into an evening in the life of two comedians, Mark Normand and Joe List, as they prepare for a gig in Long Beach, New York. Parking, driving, pizza, banter – it’s got everything. The flagrant dilly-dallying before arriving for their set time had me on the edge of my seat. These two go out of their way to be funny at almost every step and they’re a perfect pair. Makes you wish every day was Tuesgay.

SHOWS

🥉#3 Pig Royalty

The most important part of showing a pig is a stern use of the driving tool, constant eye-contact with the judge, no matter how eerie, and a steadfast appreciation of the Lord Jesus Christ. Buckle up, this one is a doozy. Not only is this the Hatfield-McCoys of the pig world, it’s probably the only pig show to ever be broadcast. Great progressive structure with a weird cast of characters that lead you further down the trough with each episode. Somebody please save Nugget.

🥈#2 Vagrant Holiday

As a spit-roasted Anthony Bourdain continually turns in his grave over the coal fires of hell, a surly, finger-pointing narrator has arrived as the new leader of international travel. Faceless and deeply cynical, his take on low-budget travel is supremely unique. So low budget that he often opts to sleep in abandoned buildings or bushes. Learning the language? No. Arguably the purest form of travel. The Crank-style use of Google Maps is also appreciated. Most of these videos are from 2018, but recent activity on the channel suggests that he hasn’t been hacked to pieces in the forest by a madman. Yet.

🏆#1 Perry Caravello Live

How much can you harass a middle-aged man with mental health issues over the Internet before he snaps? If his name is Perry Caravello, infinitely. A winner of both Twitch Streamer of the Year 2021 and Van Nuys’ Unfinished Film Festival’s Palme d'​Or Award, Perry is no stranger to the camera. As the star of the blockbuster film Windy City Heat, Perry’s reality has been documented, and partially crafted, for over two decades. Now, he’s exposing himself to the Internet three days a week during marathon-long streaming sessions that are loosely structured by his tireless producer and the adoring crowd. It’s been a wild ride and you can’t help but wonder how long it will last.

Watch Perry on Twitch

PODCASTS

🥉#3 Trash Tuesday (formerly BloodBath)

One of the best podcasts to sprout out of the 2021 hellscape. This trio provides a perfect blend of personalities for comedic conversation and, when the mood is right, they’re happy to rip each other to pieces. Oversharing and snack breaks abound, it’s an hour long show that’s nothing but fun. Despite the recent name change, it will always be BloodBath to me.

🥈#2 Take Your Shoes Off

Scoot dooo, blubbitty blooooooooo. Scoot deeee, oh yeahh! Take Your Shoes Off almost shouldn’t count as a podcast because an audio-only version would rob you of the constant visual gags. It’s not that editing in a tiny illustrated goblin peeing on a guest behind their back adds to the conversation, but the effort that it takes would be otherwise wasted. Rick Glassman is such an interesting personality, it almost doesn’t matter who he is interviewing as long as they give him a solid surface to bounce off of. The show is a weekly experiment in improv and effort and I’m always excited to tune in to see what he’s created.

🏆#1 Are You Garbage?

Kippy and Foley share the energy of a morning radio host duo in all the right ways. This show has a higher broadcast standard than I’m used to (not garbage). However, it’s all done from a wood paneled studio filled to the brim with tchotchkes (garbage). In their faux basement lair, the pair interviews comedians and personalities about their past in an attempt to gauge their garbage behavior. Do you drink milk with dinner? Did you buy your parents cigarettes? Any rented furniture in the house? How many scratch tickets have you given as gifts? Hilarious and creative questions with a semblance of structure make this one of the few podcasts I can recommend with a chance at universal appeal.

FIGHTS

🥉#3 UFC 261

After 13 months away from a live audience, hosting fights behind closed doors and on the emirtie’s islands, the UFC returned to a capacity crowd in good ol’ Florida as soon as possible. Caution had officially been thrown to the wind. The card was solid from top to bottom, but the PPV portion was instantly memorable for the chaos it created. Rolled ankles, a snapped leg, two of the cleanest female championship performances in history, and a thundering out-of-nowhere KO to close the night. A little something for everyone.

🥈#2 Brandon Moreno x Deiveson Figueiredo 2

Lighter weight classes in MMA don’t seem to get a lot of attention outside of Japan, which is a bummer because they’re able to showcase some of the highest level aspects of the sport. This 125-pound pair first met only 21 days after they each won a fight – the fastest turn around for a title fight in UFC history. What followed was an absolute war in December of last year where Tijuana’s Moreno, a heavy underdog, fought Figueiredo, the formidable champ, to an exciting draw. In the rematch, the lovable Moreno remained an almost 2:1 underdog. He turned out to be well worth the investment, as he put on a nearly flawless, career-making performance. It was Deiveson’s first time being finished and only the second loss in his career. Órale, Assassin Baby.

🏆#1 Max Holloway x Kalvin Kattar

The words “I’m the best boxer in the UFC” get thrown around every now and then, but never in the middle of a fight. It was the most devastating one-sided beatdown I’ve ever seen in a combat sport. Only fitting that the first MMA main event on ABC would be a more violent spectacle than anyone could have imagined. Kattar’s head and body were rattled by 445 significant strikes. That’s more than any two fighters combined have ever landed. The onslaught of elbows, punches, kicks, spinning attacks, and knees was jaw dropping. And head slicing. And nose breaking. Kattar is no slouch, not even close, but it was Holloway’s night to cement his flyweight legacy.

GAMES

🥉#3 Going Medieval

Developing a functioning settlement in the 14th century is way more fun than it sounds. This game takes a lot of cues from Rimworld, the holy grail of colony sims, into a low-fantasy world where you fight against famine and work to keep your forge hot. There are some notable features missing, including trade and the usual gamut of psychological woes. Still, there’s plenty to play with and considering it’s being created by a devoted five-person team, it’s worth Going Medieval during Early Access.

🥈#2 Knockout City

Coming across the court at a million miles per hour and as a complete surprise is Knockout City. This EA-published game was free-to-play for a limited time during release and I’m glad I jumped in when I had the chance. It’s 3-on-3 dodgeball in cartoon-y, urban environments and it’s dripping with style. Simple Rock, Paper, Scissor mechanics make it easy to pick up and play and it adds just the right amount of depth for a competitive team multiplayer game. Sure, it looks a little juvenile, but it plays smoothly and has the potential for Rocket League level success. I have fun every time I visit.

🏆#1 Resident Evil Village

From start to finish, every bit of this thriller is perfectly executed. Blending the action of Resident Evil IV with the style of Resident Evil VII, Village is a genuinely horrifying experience with plenty of firepower to keep things interesting. Even with the detailed visuals and more grim moments, there’s plenty of the series’ camp to be found. It’s also a relief to fight werewolves instead of zombies for once. Encountering puzzle elements felt like being trapped in an escape room, which was a completely welcome surprise. I’ve never had more fun on the wrong side of a locked door, scrounging around with what’s left of my hands.

THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO

🥉#3 Jackass Forever

It’s been quite some time since I’ve been excited about seeing a movie in theaters, but my incurable adolescence is throbbing at the prospect of a final Jackass movie. The crew is (mostly) back together to jump the gap between Millennials and Gen Z and botch the landing for a shared laugh. The obvious omission is Bam Margera, probably because they couldn’t figure out how to translate his contract into Laskian Striggoi. Regardless, the first two Jackass movies were some of my favorite theater experiences and I hope this one holds up as well as Johnny Knoxville’s old bones. The way this series has evolved into a precious cultural treasure will always warm my heart.

🥈#2 Green Knight

At long last we’re treated to a medieval tale that isn’t muddled with dragons and over-the-top CGI battles. Just old-fashioned King Arthur and the Boys with swords and round tables fighting physical manifestations of internal demons. The art direction looks particularly stunning and the production company, A24, hasn’t missed a shot in years (even though I’m not always sure what they’re aiming at).

🏆#1 Sports

Locked-down Olympic games, a probable USA/Mexico Gold Cup win, NFL football in packed-out stadiums, weekly MMA fights, Tyson Fury vs contractual obligations, and the precious Padres have me all juiced up for the back half of 2021. When sports are back we’re all back, baby. Keep your hands up and your fingers crossed.